Surgery Anniversary

 

Today feels a bit different than last September 23rd, last year we were waiting around Duke all day waiting to hear if Keller's surgery would happen, feeling excitement and doom when we found out it would happen and then kissing him goodbye and handing him over to a surgeon.  But last September 23rd changed his life. 

Keller is thriving! He is busier than I ever imagined a boy could be.  He loves to walk, is learning to run, loves to read books and is so excited about books he giggles through you reading it.  Norah and he are always laughing and playing. He is into everything and I literally mean everything.  He drums on everything he can find.  He is always moving stuff from one room to another. The house has never been messier! He recently started squeezing you back when you hug him which is just fantastic! Norah tells him daily "Keller you're adorable!"

I know that sometimes God uses earthly things to teach us heavenly messages.  I also know that heart surgery does not equal salvation but follow me...I have been reflecting the last couple of weeks about what I am supposed to glean from Keller's situation.  One thing I have continued to hear is "life more abundant."  I feel that God has given me a glimpse of the life He has for me.  Keller was alive before surgery but his body was weak and he was frail, every breath, every beat of his heart was work. It is hard to compare his life before and his life after surgery.  Now he can grow, crawl, walk, run, play with his sister, play and laugh and smile like he never could before, that is what God wants for us.  He wants us to relish this life and view it as only a glimpse of what is to come. He has a life more abundant waiting for you and for me we just have to embrace it.

As far as an update on Keller, realistically you can hardly tell he is any different from other 15/16 month olds.  He does not speak very much he says "uh-oh," "yay," and occasionally "bye." He still get most (about 90%) of his food through his g-tube.  He is interested in food and can crunch, chew and swallow things like crackers and veggie straws, he likes yogurt and some baby food.  His major issue is learning to swallow foods like apples, green beans and other typical go-to foods for kids who and pick things up to eat.  He tends not to chew and swallow and just holds food in his mouth and then gets gagged.  At his most recent appointment with his pediatrician I mentioned this and he thought maybe a speech therapist could help again now that he has gotten past some of his texture issues.  He will likely have a speech evaluation soon and we will say what they suggest.   We are at a point where he sees his specialists about every 6 months which puts cardiology in November and GI in February.

He is really doing well but I still have fear and anxiety about things changing.  I still worry about him all through the night.  I like to put him in stripes because its easy for me to tell, even with sleepy eyes, that he is breathing. Sometimes the fear of losing him is so loud I can't sleep but I'm learning (as recently as last night) that I have to trust and surrender today just as I did last year, I need to embrace the abundant life God has given me on this earth. 

Thank you for your encouraging words and for your continued prayers you have certainly helped propel our family forward.  Keller still has a huge fan club! <3